Turning Point
by raven-eyed-lass
Summary: Because all the turning points of her life revolved around him. Oneshot.


**Disclaimer: Code Geass is owned by its rightful owners. Characters and plot were only used as basis for this work of fiction.**

~oOo~

A/N: (Edited) If you can understand Japanese Songs (even a little) I recommend that you listen to Otsuka Ai's _Daisuki da yo _while reading this_. _You may also listen to her other songs such as _Love Letter, Tears, _or_ Renai Shashin__. _Promise, the emotive effect might be twice as much. I wonder why Otsuka Ai's songs fit this pairing sooo much. :'(

I'll be silent for now. First CG fic, and a Shirley x Lelouch at that. For other notes, please read them after reading the whole story. Thank you. Btw, this is a continuous story from the first to second season.

~oOo~

_**Turning Point**_

_~oOo~_

I always imagine that we are a couple. We will hold hands, we will share sweet nothings, we will go on real dates, and we will share more than just a single hug and a kiss. I have tried to shrug off those thoughts as I accidentally gaze at you sleeping while our class is going on. Right, you have never changed. You were like that since we became classmates here at the Academy. You looked unoccupied, not bothered, and passive of everything happening around you. Even during that accident when you saved that aged couple, your face did not move even a muscle. But since then, despite all those flaws you possess, I felt that I saw you in a new light... and this is the start of my turning point.

* * *

I often imagine that we are a couple. We will hold hands, we will share sweet nothings, we will go on real dates, and we will share more than just a single hug and a kiss. This I thought as I put the gun in my hands for the second time. I have come to like you so much that the first time I held this thing I shot someone just to protect you. I wanted to protect you, everything about you, your secret, your pain, your tears, and with this gun I will do it. There is still a tiny chance that even after we both die, I will find you and fall in love with you again, right? I will pay for all your sins and my sins as well. And if the gods are to smile upon me before I die, I want to be beside you and hold your hand.

"If reincarnation is real, I...!"

Lelou, please don't hope that it is true. Because the truth is, the second I screamed to stop you from erasing my memories, I realized that I will be the happiest girl in this world if you are just by my side, even if it is in death that you will finally look at me and tell me that you love me.

But you succeeded, and the moments that followed, there is not even recognition when I saw a face. The feeling was vague, but that moment when a stranger talked to me about his important friend, I knew I've just come from another turning point.

* * *

I frequently imagine that we are a couple. We will hold hands, we will share sweet nothings, we will go on real dates, and we will share more than just a single hug and a kiss_._ You are a new face, and I really don't get why I feel attached to you. Okay, I'll let the fact that you are handsome slip, and there's something in your eyes which baffles me the most. But I really don't get why we are being teased to fix things up. I only find you mysterious and aloof, and the feeling itself was terrifying when I found that letter I wrote. It was all about you. It was all about me. I wrinkled my brows and the tears moistened my skirt. Now I know why I am being bothered by the numerous dreams every night with your face in it. We held hands, we embraced each other, and we kissed. Even though those bitter memories of yesterday returned, with them returned the memories I will give my life to have. Since then, I loved you, and ever since again. For another point in time, I found my turning point.

* * *

I sometimes imagine that we are a couple. We will hold hands, we will share sweet nothings, we will go on real dates, and we will share more than just a single hug and a kiss. Didn 't we go on a real date? Even though it was to buy Ms. Villetta a gift, I knew it as a date. And in the student council office where you kissed me... At those times, I really felt that it was the closest thing we can become to a couple. But somehow, amidst all these things happening, I felt that you were not being yourself. At times you are too friendly, and for a time you were a womanizer (I won't forgive you for even daring to date so many girls!), but for most of the time you hide sadness behind the facade you show everyone. You have always been alone, sad, and a liar to yourself and everyone else around you. It was such a happiness that you were back to normal when you saved me again at the place you supposedly kissed me... Where you act like a child when asked if you have been a god boy, you look around asking for a desperate answer. You become human again. Like not that Zero who everyone hated just because he would not tell the reason behind his actions. Deep in my heart, I knew you just needed someone to trust, someone to be truthful to you, even for just a moment. Can I claim that challenge and be that person? Even for just now...

* * *

For one last time, I imagine that we are a couple. We will hold hands, we will share sweet nothings, we will go on real dates, and we will share more than just a single hug and one kiss. My mind has been preoccupied with those things before but now, it's just dizzy with all the blood I continue to lose as I lay in this cold, rough ground. I close my eyes and continue imagining things perhaps for the last time. This world has become so cold and rough, just like this ground where I am lying in. I have always admired you – from the time you were just the Lelou I started to like, until now that you are the Zero, the person in mask trying to carry all the world's burden in his thin shoulders and change it with bloodshed. Even though you made me forget as did everyone else, I can not understand myself why I can never hate you. This must be that power I told you, right? And even though I saw you several times in a new light, I still kept falling for you over and over again. This must be fate, right Lelou? It's okay if I'm blood-drenched like this now, right? Because I'm sure that if now is just a memory, or a haunting past, or this is really life I will experience with you, I'll be glad to hold your hand even if just for the last time. And for now, this is my last turning point.

~oOo~

A/N: Yeah. It was supposed to be angsty since I have to release the pent-up emotions for running a marathon of the second season. Although I'm not quite sure if I captured the image I wanted to portray (what with all the tense confusion, perhaps?) Please, if someone would be willing to correct my mistakes, feel free to message me. I'll correct it as soon as I can, 'kay? Shirley x Lelouch! :)) Till the next fic!


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